Anxiety

So I haven't written in awhile because honestly, I am completely overwhelmed. I used to think that brides-to-be were acting "silly" when they said such things, but now I am feeling them - hardFREAKINGcore. Just when you think one thing is done, you have oh, about a million other things to do. Planning a wedding IS NOT fun. Don't let anyone trick you. Especially when you AND YOUR PARENTS get a call from the church you booked telling them you need to tell them who the priest is going to be RIGHT FREAKING NOW. When you tell them you thought you had 6 months to make this decision, they remind you that no, you only had a month to do this. The 6 month deadline was for THEM to have everything in, not you. This reminds you that your listening skills may not be as acute as you though they were. You day then consists of frantic phone calls to everyone that you can possibly think of. The Catholic University where you dumped SO MUCH money into tells you they cannot help you. You want to punch them in the face, but then rethink your decision in fear of being sent to hell. You then think that this is God's way of punishing you for living in sin, using his name in vain, the thousands of impure thoughts you have in one day among ever other thing your overactive imagination can think of. You wave your fist into the sky and yell "You really got me good this time, God! I promise to be a better person, I really do. Please, just let me have an officiant! I will be a good Catholic after this. I will donate money to the poor and collect all of my canned goods for the them too. I'm going to freak out here God, please throw me a bone, or you know, a priest!" Then a priest who taught you chemistry in high school calls you back and agrees to do the wedding. You breathe a sigh of relief until you realize you still have to book a photographer. A GOOD photographer, who will not only be AVAILABLE on your wedding date, but also take wonderful pictures, be friendly (most aren't, most have zero zip zilch personalities), and have a reasonable price - no easy feat. You fall back into panic mode. ESPECIALLY when you realize if the god damn Pittsburgh Steelers which you hate with the wrath of a thousand fiery suns have a game the weekend of your wedding, the prices for the hotel rooms you intend to block will jump almost ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS. You continue to hate the Steelers even more now and root for them to loose every game day. You especially hate Big Ben because he reminds you of an ex boyfriend. You proceed to re-name his as "Big White Trash".

Phew. That actually felt good. Maybe I should start writing in this blog more often. OK, I promise there will be more posts, as long as your not ready to smack me across my already inflating Bridezilla head.

On the plus side, we set a date. A date that I'm not too happy with being it is later in the year than I anticipated, but the venue was too beautiful to turn down because of just a stupid date standing in my way. Want to see why? Oh *blush* I thought you'd never ask:

I know they're small, and really the pictures really do not do this place justice, but it was just so Us. Original, quirky, beautiful, Us. You know that feeling your supposed to have when you try on a wedding gown? Like, THIS. IS. THE. DRESS? Well, I had the same feeling with this place. I just knew. The trip I made to another venue the next day did not even need to be done, but I did it to please Mamma. Because if Mamma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy. But thats besides the point.

Oh! And the church! THE CHURCH! is my dream church. I always pictured myself walking down a looooong aisle with a cathedral length train in a Gothic style church. Sort of how Maria looked in The Sound of Music. I have even considered having the organist play "How Do You Solve a Problem Like Maria" instead of "Here Comes the Bride" when I walk down the aisle. I just love the moment in that movie. It still gives me chills every time I watch it. I wish I could show you guys pictures of the church, but I can't seem to find any. Oh well, hopefully most of you will be so lucky as to be invited. And if your not - HA! OK, just kiding.

Well, that's all for right now. Hopefully more posts will ensue whenever I figure out how to reattach my head to my body. And hopefully I don't misplace my precious head before then, because you know they would always tell me, "If your head wasn't attached to your body, you would loose it." Now is my chance to prove them wrong, I suppose.

Things I Love

Beautiful Dresses for Moi:

Beautiful dresses for my girls:

Flowers for the bridesmaids:

Stressin'

I am starting to get stressed. Did I mention I only got engaged about a week and two days ago?!? Apparently, if I want to get married in October of 2008, Boyfriend should have proposed about 2 months ago. Things are booking up, and right now I am about to go bat shit crazy. I officially begin my reception hall hunt tomorrow at 5pm. But for some reason I feel as though this is too late. I feel like this should have been done, like I should have been BORN with a place to have my reception hall. However, Momzilla and I have it narrowed down to about 4 places: The Hilton, The Marriott, Omni William Penn (my favorite), and Stratigos (mom's favorite). Others were already nixed because of date issues and our extremely obnoxiously massive guest list.

Wedding dresses are another issue for me. In the past week, I went to two different boutiques (both of which are EXTREMELY cheap and I would never buy anything from them) just to try things on to see which style looked best on me. Well apparently, I don’t really have a choice because EVERYTHING is strapless. Which leads to the sales people trying to push them on me. Which then leads to me saying rude comments to them such as this:

Sales Lady: I think strapless looks really good on you! You have great shoulders!

Me: Thanks, that’s why I want an OFF THE SHOULDER dress.

Sales Lady: Well I think strapless looks great on you! What don’t you like about it?

Me: This! *I put up my arm up in the air and jiggle my arm fat*

Sales Lady: Well when is your wedding?

Me: October of next year.

Sales Lady: Well you can go to the gym…..

Me: Excuse me? Ma'am? I am NOT one of those brides that want to loose a gajillion pounds before her wedding day. I think I look hot just the way I am.

*Maid of Honor #1 (aka Favorite Cousin) stares in shock*

I know, I know it was rude. But really, who comments on your fat arm?!?!?! Isn't it your job to tell me I don’t have any? Well, at least the crazy sales lady didn't try to lie to me.

My second trip to another Bridal Shop was just as interesting. A girl that was an absolute space cadet was assigned to me. I don’t think she had any idea where she even was, let alone what she was doing. Maid of Honor #2 (aka Old College Roommate) pointed out that maybe I could try a lace shrug with a strapless dress. I thought this was a great idea. I showed Space Cadet a picture that was just about as tall as I was, that had a model wearing one of these shrugs. She came back with some crazy looking white jacket that was apparently made for an elf. This was not what I was talking about. As you can guess, every dress she brought me I hated. I ended up just giving up, thanking her for her time and leaving her so she could be beamed back up to the mothership she came down from.

So this is it so far. On a brighter note, I entered a contest at the Bridal Expo I went to on Saturday and won 50% off a wedding planner! On a dim note, she's probably going to be booked for when I want her. Apparently I should have started planning for this wedding when Alex and I first met. Did you know Feline AIDS is the #1 killer of domestic cats? Yes, I am a total Debbie Downer today.

All Things Begin With An Engagement of Some Sorts

Well ladies and gents, it has finally happened. He proposed, I accepted. It was not a surprise, which was a good thing. If there's one thing I hate most in this world it’s a surprise. He spoiled the surprise in three ways, in which I will list for your right now:

1. He asked me when my dad was coming home. Never in THREE years has this man ever asked and/or cared when Dad was coming home. This sent my snooping alarm bells off.

2. He gave me a curfew to be home from my shopping trip that afternoon. I was told that I had to be DRESSED AND READY by 5:45pm SHARP! Yes sir, drill sergeant sir!

3. He told me he couldn't afford to go to a haunted house, but wanted to go to a nice dinner. Sometimes I think he doesn't give me enough credit in my extraordinary snooping capabilities.

I ruined the surprise myself, I will list these ways as well:

1. I interrogated a friend about it. Apparently Boyfriend leaked some information to her boyfriend. She told me. I have great interrogation skills.

2. Since I already had the bling (aka the diamond), Boyfriend only had to buy the band. I saw the empty ring box in his car, which showed me that he had taken the diamond to get the ring made. *Note* This was totally accidental, OK well not really.

3. I kept pumping him for information, and he would finally break and tell me little tidbits. Once again, I have great interrogation skills. *Note To Self* perhaps seek out career in law enforcement.

He proposed in a beautiful park down in Pittsburgh . I love my ring. Its so beautiful I want to love it and squish it and call it George….but its sharp, and I really don't need to do those kinds of things to a ring anyways. After that, we went to dinner where we had our first "official" date over three years ago (our first date consisted of going to a bar where they have and event called "Midget Throwing Mondays" so that one didn't count). We topped off the night celebrating at a friend's house, which led to me throwing up on the side of the road.

A proposal and alcohol abuse all in one night. I'm a lucky girl.